More British madness...you couldn't make this up

[Beeyar Wunby]

Hi all, I don't normally quote from a paper I despise, but this time the Daily Maul has got wind of the insanity.

Brand spanking new trains that can't be used because they didn't think it through...

Click on this link.....Class 717 madness

Read it and weep, as they say.

BW

[aussiesteve]

G'day BW,
Finally at the local library and able to take a squiz at yer Pommy newspaper report.
HMMM.
I must say that I find "Jenny's" improvised flag a tad confusing.
Green brambles for GO and Red bloomers for STOP.
Did them railway children get run over ?
Yer newbie class 717 don't got much of a view out the side of the cab.
Management must want to prevent you lot from day dreaming out the side.
And, if the door closer pump looses it's oomph, yer moveable side wall will flap about in the breeze.
The front door of our modern day smog hollow squirts are only for emergency use.
Cattle are not permitted to transit between the two four car blocks amalgamated into an 8 car train.
Hence, the drivers cab is full width.
Old squirts did possess the angled side wall with a door to seal the drivers cab when not in use.
And, to permit cattle to transit between amalgamated sets.
But, there is still a cab side window provided.
I can only advise that you don't feast on baked beans the night before you go to toil on yer newbie class 717.
Steve.

[Beeyar Wunby]

Yo Steve

Jenny Agutter waving red bloomers. Meeeeeowwww ! A whole generation, myself included, fell in love with her for doing that. It's the only reason I joined the railway !


The real silliness revolves around 717s being designed for In-Cab Signalling only, when everybody could see that the Moorgate Line wouldn't be running ERTMS for the foreseeable future. So now there are sidings full of them, blocking the job.

They've had to retrofit 19th century tripcock arms to the units, and can only run them as 5-car units on the NCL because they have to stop one carriage short in order to be able to see the tunnel wall signals. And this on one of the most crowded London transport systems.

717s are derived from class 700s which have a beautiful cab with a panoramic window at the front. But the need for emergency end doors has kyboshed that arrangement. It's a pity they coudn't have slung the ladder under the body and put the egress door on the right. Trouble is they're worried about people getting zapped by the 3rd rail (even though the driver must kill the juice with a short-circuit bar before the pax are allowed down onto the line)

What a palaver.

(NB, I'm now learning how to author DVDs)

Cheers, BW.

[aussiesteve]

G'day BW,
Yeh, the cab mockup for our newbie interurban emus seems to clutter the cab with electronic junk.
The computer nerd attitude being that if the driver squizzes his computer screen, he don't need to squiz out the front or side.
The computer will do it all.
The smog hollow driverless Metro dingus also has a front door.
When it becomes stranded in one of the tunnels, the cattle will be told to move to the front and open the door.
Sling down the steps and clamber down into the four foot and hoof to the nearest station.
OK, we don't got three rail oomph to worry about.
Our oomph swings in the atmosphere.
But, if the thing karks it underground and the main lights go out, can you image the PANIC.
DON'T PANIC, as Jones the butcher kept telling the Dad's Army lads.
I have seen what lurks in the smog hollow regular Rat Holes.
We don't call em Rat Holes for no reason.
Big enough vermin down there in the gloom to chew off yer leg.
At least I rattled around the metals when the driver ACTUALLY drove the thing.
ER UM, you are putting pen to paper to "author" DVDs ?
Yeh, creating the Menu can take longer than editing the actual footage.
Steve.